Welcome Taiba

I was having lots of plans to do before my little girl arrives, we still need to buy her stuff & ours as well.I was expecting to give birth during the second week or so of my last pregnancy month.

But! on the second day of 9th month, I was surprised that my girl is on the way!

On 12/2/2012 @ 9:59 pm Taiba has arrived to this world, hamdolela, I suffered during delivery, but when I saw her, i totally forgot what i faced.

She's tooo tiny! a 2.5 kilo!

Sobhan Allah, whatever we plan, Allah has better plans to us.

في ذمة الله يا رفيقة النضال

كُلُّ مَنْ عَلَيْهَا فانٍ . وَيَبْقَى وَجْهُ رَبِّكَ ذُو الْجَلالِ وَالإكْرَامِ

علا معاذ ... الله يرحمك يا رفيقة النضال

Home in Canada

Although I have never ever thought that I’ll gonna have a home here in Canada! But seems I need one, even here!

Still we didn’t settle down, still we are searching for an apartment, even for a room! we just wana a place to consider it as home, I drop what I said! I’ll have home here, and can’t wait to find it, and say Home Sweet Home ..

à Montréal

Across the seas, with -14 degree, from Montreal I send my regards.

One simple word describes it at the moment! It’s so gray!!!

Flying to Montreal

Seems 2012 gonna be a year full of changes!

Mhmdy & I are flying to Canada/Montreal as we have applied for immigration since ages, and finally we’ve got the visa!

By first of January I’ll be there! :S I’ll give birth there inshalla!

Can’t concentrate! Don’t know from where I shall start! What should I do! My to do list is too long! We’ve bought the bags yesterday, so you can say one item is done.

I’m not that much excited! As I said once I’m neutral towards everything! Even toward this shift! I just wana go their & end the 4 years period & return back here!

I haven’t lived out of Amman all my life! How it gonna be! Can I cope toward my homesickness & missing my family! Would I survive & get a life there?

After 9 Months We've Met

Can’t describe how much I feel happy today, finally we have met after 9 months!

One day they told me that you won’t dream with a dead person until you stop crying and feeling sad about it, on that day, I kept telling myself foolish words such as: “Yay Mariamty is not with me”& “Nanananana I’ll not see Mariamty again”& such … I was duping myself! And it didn’t work!

But yesterday, I remembered how much I was happy during Mariamty illness, and I used to tell people around: that those days are the best I lived, even the nights we spent at KHCC, I was feeling super, peaceful, & glad. Thus I’ve convinced myself that I should be so NOW! What’s up with me! My child is in heaven, at least I granted a child there! She’s feeling happy there, why she needs to be here! There is really better for her … etc of these thoughts, and it was my first time I don’t give a tear or feel that sorrow in my heart when remembering our last hug!

I woke up one hour earlier today, I met Mariamty in my dream, it was a nice dream, she walked towards me, I kissed her, & hold her ... I’ve really missed her … Hamdolela that finally Mariamty visited me, I’ll be waiting her every night

Finally, I’m Excited :)

Baby! I’ve finally felt your kick! It was last night, when I was going to sleep! They were only two kicks but they were enough to make me happy :) I wonder why now I’ve just felt them!? Is it because of the movie I watched; Final Destination 5, sorry I’ve freaked you out so many times :) I was waiting for those tiny kicks few days ago; as in my last visit to the Dr. you were so active turning upside down, touching your feet, & sleeping on your tummy, on that day my neutral status was changed to excitement, when he told us you are probably a girl, once I’ve heard that a big smile was on my face, I filled in joy, same as your dady, he surprised me how much he was happy … Hamdolela … he also whished you to be as wonderful as your sister Mariamty …

I’m excited now! & I’m in love with your kicks, they let me feel there’s a life inside me! & that our special secret moments have started.